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Originally Posted by Samurai of 2day
I never agreed with that quote " better to have love lost, then to have never loved at all".
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Well from the perspective of someone who has never had a face-to-face relationship until I was 27 (long story somewhere in this forum, but 28 now), "never loved at all" is an even worse experience... I just got out of a relationship, and part of me wishes that I experienced all the pitfalls of a dead-end relationship earlier in life so that I can experience all the pros and cons of it all and know what to look for...
Rather than going through life for as long as I did alternating between believing weird misconceptions about women that were totally untrue and I could've been dating at 19 if I knew then what I knew now, and "As long as she's a breathing human being and it says 'Female' on her birth certificate I'm fine with anything" mentality where I've settled for a girl with hardly any redeeming qualities.
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Originally Posted by Ben2k9
Ok man, here's some legit advice: you gotta get out more and start dating regularly. You're hung up on a girl you've never met and that will scare off a girl in a heartbeat. When you meet a girl who's top notch, you've got to be interested, confident, but not dependent and stalkerish. There's a fine line...well maybe it's more like a big fat line. You're obsessing over every little detail of how you said hello, which is a little pathetic. But it's ok, you can build up to being a stud. You've gotta start somewhere.
But the only way to enhance your mojo is to get out there and experience some success and failure and build up your confidence. Start with some easier targets (you know what I mean) to build confidence.
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THIS. As someone who has flopped plenty of dates before I found someone, there's nothing more frustrating than developing feelings for someone and finding out that they find you as romantically interesting as a turd on a stick.
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Originally Posted by grimlock
Aw gee thanks man! That really does wonders for my confidence.. 
No, I didn't mean to present her as arrogant.. I mean she has 2k facebook friends and I only showed her a pic of my car, my cat, and my niece and I (can barely see me because I am making some weird expression)
I know man, I am just reading this ebook "Alpha relational dynamics" (you can stop laughing now) which is saying what you are saying.. make yourself the prize instead of her, the way she is used to , and then u will at least stand out somewhat and have a chance beyond her throngs of admirers
This is going to take some work, I don't have any females to play off of her..
I'm hoping shes into me for my intelligence, personality, 'potential' etc. I'm hoping she's not just looking for a male model, or a rich guy.. I won't cut it.
If she likes brains, is my only chance....... |
As someone who gone through tons of PUA material (I had 20GB dedicated to books and videos at one point), it's just a bunch of nonsense that makes you have a sense of direction and ergo, confidence. But being yourself, confident and trusting your intuition on when to make the first move without being overbearing is what it boils down to, but the C+F method worked wonders too. The whole "peacocking" "Mystery Method's A1 A2 A3, S1-3, M1-3" "Pandora's N/T, J/D, I/R type" is just to give you a sense of specific direction for something that can go any which way. It helps, but I found that ditching 80% of what I remember rather than rigidly following everything was what garnered me the most success.