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      04-15-2014, 06:50 PM   #23
grimlock
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Originally Posted by Billup View Post
Both. I feel if you can live a happy and fulfilled life here on earth, than you are destined to live a happy life in the after-world. I don't want to get into the after-life talk for reasons I think we all know, but I think your time here on earth will be a good representation of your being there after.

I still struggle with this from day to day, and its only because of my own decision to continue on as I have, because the only one who can make that change is myself (and YOU for YOU).

You do HAVE to accept being pissed off as a part of life. I am honestly curious how many people on this earth can say they live a full hearted happy life without stress based on their own positive perception and situational awareness. The number is probably extremely limited, because it is a fact of life, the difference is how someone can overcome and remain empowered in hard times that might put most "over the edge".
I must say you have a very good philosophy on life.

If we MUST accept whatever life presents for us.. is trying to be happy the same as cheating God? (or whatever Order of life you believe in)
If the purpose of "happiness" is to control us to do certain things and not others -just as physical pain is used by the body to tell our higher executive conscienceness to avoid bodily harm- then unless we are God, or God does not exist/there is no comprehendible 'order' to the world, we are DOOMED to be unhappy (at times) when our donkey selves stray off the path.

This is very sad - there is no escape from unhappiness.
FUCK GOD !!!!!!
(not like it would offend him if he does exist)
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      04-15-2014, 07:07 PM   #24
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Originally Posted by upstatedoc View Post
BM=bowel movement
spoken like a doc

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Originally Posted by Nkc View Post
LOL and the GAY part got your attention

Have you thought about why you're pissed all the time? I'm sure everyone gets pissed at different stuff but just gotta learn to live and let live. I've given up on trying to make changes to things that shouldn't even affect me. Sometimes it is what it is and that goes for the people in your life too. I stopped comparing myself with other people and just began searching for what I wanted in life. When people say, "hey you should be happy because you have this and that" my answer is always "hey I think you're right, I am pretty damn happy actually, thanks for reminding me." Whatever happens, I always tell myself that I've been thru worse. There's always someone in a worse situation than you.

To be honest, 5 years ago I was miserable. I was working a job in a trading company where I had no place to advance. I made a promise to my gf (now wife) that we'd go to HK, test things out for 3 years and leave if things didn't pan out. I was seriously making $7500hkd a month (~$1k usd) and I was broke, dead broke. My hopes and dreams were dying and its hard to take a moment to enjoy anything when life's like that. Everything I did was miserable to a point where I made my gf miserable too for constantly bitching about us coming to HK in the first place. I was pissed at everything that was happening because I kept comparing myself to my peers. When I stopped doing that, I found myself and went on a straight path to achieving things that I personally liked/wanted. Ultimately, my goal was to be able to get married, have kids and be able to retire before they would have to go to elementary school in HK. I'd hate for them to go to school here. We would all move back to Vancouver and my kid(s) would be able to experience things that their parents were fortunate to experience in Van.

Dude, HK is a miserable place. I live in YL and I try my best to stay away for the hustle and bustle life of HK. Maybe we should grab a drink sometime and talk about the things that piss you off.
I think part of the reason why I'm pissed is because my parents are sadist. They claim to operate from morality but without empathy - thus acceptance of them is impossible without first refuting their argument of representing the greater morality.
They are partial respectively to each of my siblings - as the middle child I guess they decided to try the 'tough love' approach but without warmth - hence the psychopath in front of you today.
I don't care if people are better or worse off then me - yeah I think for me it's just when ppl try to make me unhappy for no reason - it echoes because it must be what my parents do to me. Thanks for the therapy, doc

Yeah, I see how my brother has to start applying for everything now at birth.. i wonder how they are going to afford 3+kids they say they want.. or even if they will just stop after the next one cuz it's so hard..
That's a good plan.. HK really is no place to raise a child.
I was in the playroom and this 4yr old boy is throwing bricks at my 1.5yr niece, so I scold him after the 2nd time. Then he comes along later with his friend, I stare him down with my man face.. he looks at his meaner friend, who says to me "What are you smiling at?" .. thankfully I came up with a good response: "What are YOU smiling at?" .. OMG 4yrs old.. can you believe it? not even scared.. and challenging me to ask me what MY problem is? I should have checked out what kind of psychopath mom encourage the child to be this way... Jesus Christ.
Sure, we could always meet up sometime since we're in the same city..
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      04-15-2014, 07:11 PM   #25
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Originally Posted by Prowess Symphony View Post
Last year I was at my worst and extremely depressed and lost 60 pounds from not eating yet this year has been my best. I picked up my dream car in Germany, have a beautiful and wonderful gf, building a cabin and just enjoying the simple things. Other people don't affect my happiness though such as random jerks I run into on the street. I get happy or sad depending upon what I do and how I interact with the world and the people around me. So for now I'm just trying to enjoy the happy before it all comes crashing down haha.
Good for you, man.
Nobody said it HAS to come crashing down

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Originally Posted by Litos View Post
when I listen to The Eagles' "Peaceful Easy Feeling", I can immediately get happy....
You are the happiness monster. It's not enough for me. My rage is deep..
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      04-15-2014, 07:14 PM   #26
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Happiness is such an elusive and ephemeral quality. One moment, it's there, the next, it's gone. In the end, it takes our own willpower to CREATE it. If we try to find the wrong in everything, we will never be happy. On the other hand, if we seek the good, and appreciate it, we will be forever happy. I suffered from depression for years, and now, I'm at that amazing point in my life where I'm incredibly grateful for all that I have. Just take a look around you. Most people don't have half of what we have, and yet they are a hundred times happier. Why? Because having less makes you appreciate what little you have. I remember when I was younger, my father told me the best story that truly epitomized happiness:
There once was a king, who fell prey to some unknown illness. All of the doctors and all of the priests in the kingdom could not cure him. As he lay on his deathbed, his son desperately went to a local man of wisdom. The man of wisdom told him that the only cure was to find the happiest man in the entire kingdom and bring his shirt to the king. For days and days, the king's men searched the kingdom for this man. They began with the upper-class, falling into the misconception that the wealthy would be happier since they were not in discomfort. They fruitlessly searched, until they finally reached a little hut on the edge of the kingdom. Inside, the happiest man in the kingdom was dancing. The son was incredibly happy that they could finally get his shirt and cure the king. But this man did not even own a shirt.
This story taught me so much about the way happiness works. I know the moral of the story wraps up nicely, but life doesn't always work perfectly. People say that you can be happy without money, but sometimes it isn't true. Money doesn't guarantee happiness, but it is much much harder to be happy without it.
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      04-15-2014, 07:59 PM   #27
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Quote:
Originally Posted by grimlock View Post

happiness=conditional
joy=unconditional ?
This is a good way to think about it, but does it mean you have to accept that you have nothing, so therefor the loss of nothing cannot piss you off?
You must be a master zen monk.
Mind=blown
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      04-16-2014, 12:33 PM   #28
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Originally Posted by grimlock View Post
Good for you, man.
Nobody said it HAS to come crashing down

It doesn't have to but accepting that life can change at any moment makes me appreciate how amazing things are going now and if it does come crashing down at least I'm prepared to go back to wine, cigars, and pie everyday all day.
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      04-16-2014, 10:49 PM   #29
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I don't get this - why does it offend ppl when you are happy?
This is what I mean by sadistic ppl.. they aren't happy unless you are unhappy..
I have no idea Grimlock, the saying "mystery loves company" is true. I can just feel the tension and anger around people around me because i'm generally happy and in a good mood almost always.

At my old job, anytime i talked about some good things that happened to me, everyone hates me and calls me a looser. I dont try to brag or rub it in their face, im just being generous and having a normal conversation but they dont wanna hear it.

When i talked about the bad things that happened to me, all of a sudden theyre all my best friends.

I'm African so i see a lot of hate especially from other Black Americans. They expect me to come from Africa and be poor and jump from tree branch to tree branch with a Chimpanzee on my back... You should see the shock and awe in their faces when i don't match their expectation, its like theyre frustrated that i'm actually doing good in life.

The reason they act that way is basically ignorance and their lives arent going anywhere.
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      04-16-2014, 11:02 PM   #30
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Happiness is literally a state of mind. Your happiness is 100% controlled by you. You either choose to be happy or you choose to be sad. Their are outside factors that can sway your decision to be happy, sad, depressed, etc... but the final decision is yours and yours alone.
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      04-20-2014, 02:38 PM   #31
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I have come up with this formulation, in case anyone is still interested.

unhappiness is the message from 'God' (or natural law, the Universe etc.) that you are doing something wrong, and you must (and can, otherwise why would there be a message) change. A rock is never happy because there is nothing a rock can do.
This fits in with the metaphysical approximations of "the meaning of life/existence" in that life, or experience, is the playing out of subjectivity (ie. viewpoint) a la objectivity with the 'goal' of transition from bad (disorder) to good (order).
This is a self-contained explanation for existence.. in which the role of 'happiness' is to direct you, the 'ignorant' actor/individual to the right path of creation of order from disorder, in which you are paid in happiness.
And thus you know your true essence (and no longer ignorant) which is the subjectivity of objectivity, the crumb from the bread. That you are a part of a whole, but being the part you are subject to suffering but at least can work for happiness once you see the path. This is kind of like God sending Jesus to live on earth etc.
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      04-20-2014, 02:45 PM   #32
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The world does not HAVE to exist, but if it does the only condition is that it is imperfect. There is non-existence, which is nothing, the time before the big bang.
And there is 'heaven' which is perfection and there is no suffering because everything is perfect.. but this is not existence.. because existence requires dis-unity.. which incidently is imperfection.. and subjectivity. Subjectivity, or seperation from the 'self' is required for you to 'see' the world.. otherwise you are whole and what is there to see, you cannot see yourself etc. (this is heaven)

I know this looks bad...
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      04-21-2014, 08:22 AM   #33
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Quote:
Originally Posted by grimlock View Post
The world does not HAVE to exist, but if it does the only condition is that it is imperfect. There is non-existence, which is nothing, the time before the big bang.
And there is 'heaven' which is perfection and there is no suffering because everything is perfect.. but this is not existence.. because existence requires dis-unity.. which incidently is imperfection.. and subjectivity. Subjectivity, or seperation from the 'self' is required for you to 'see' the world.. otherwise you are whole and what is there to see, you cannot see yourself etc. (this is heaven)

I know this looks bad...
The key to happiness is whatever you're smoking buddy.
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      04-22-2014, 08:32 PM   #34
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Good quote
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